LIVERPOOL-MANCHESTER-DUBLIN-MANCHESTER
So this update is going to jump around rather quickly because I jump around (and talk) rather quickly. After Stockholm, we flew into Liverpool for yet more days off (there were no hotels available in Manchester so they put us out in Beatlesville). The priority of the night was finding food and drink and then getting to bed early because I had a suspicious feeling (which was later confirmed) that the next few days might be rough. Apparently this is the only building in Liverpool I deemed cool enough to photograph. Although looking back through my collection, its the only picture I took in Liverpool at all, so I guess it made it into this update by default.


The next morning Matt and I took a car from Liverpool to Manchester airport, where the cabbie casually told us he had to drop us in a parking lot far from the airport and we had to walk in past several police barricades because of all the bomb scares in the UK. Nice world we live in, eh? We then flew to the motherland........Ireland. Endless pints of beer and funny drunk people everywhere....I'm pretty sure I lived here in a former life or that I have some ancestry here.

Oh! I forgot to tell you why I flew to Ireland. Ha. In our brilliant (pea-sized) minds, we had concocted a scheme to make some extra money on this tour. Our company was doing a video wall for two different festivals with a band called "The Killers." So we said, hey, it will save the company some money if we do these festivals since they didn't have to fly a new crew all the way overseas - and we can demand they pay us extra for this favor! haha (Joke is on them - this will be a piece of cake for lots of $$) So our crew was divided between Scottland (Tea In The Park Festival) and Ireland (Oxygen Festival) and me and Matt were picked to go to Ireland. So we arrive at a dodgy hotel in the middle of nowhere at 8 p.m. At midnight a car service picks us up to drive us into this huge festival just as the last band (Muse) was finishing up so we could do an overnight load in and be ready by the time the first band started playing at noon. Umm, noone mentioned this when we made these plans. Yikes. What have I got myself into.
Matt and I huddled in a tent to stay out of the pouring rain and cold (it was about 40 degrees) until 5:30 in the morning - when we finally were allowed to get our video gear off the truck. In the meantime, we are hopping around fields of pure mud trying to find a port-a-let or some food with very little success....


Here is the sunrise and us loading in the video wall around 6a.m. Notice there is no one else there to help us. No stage hands - they just up and quit after working for 20 hours straight).


Not even one of the 150,000 drunk rowdy kids from the show the night before to heckle us. No, these brave (stupid??) kids stay in camping tents in a field next to the stages for three days with no place to shower or change out of their muddy clothes! Now, I've always thought I was a pretty spontaneous, fun person - but I'm going to sound like my mother now....You have to be out of your damn mind to pay over 100 Euros to camp in the freezing rain, stand in the mud all day (pretty sure some of the kids never moved from the front few rows, meaning they must have had a "built-in porta-potty" in their pants) and be deafened by music for three days straight. Completely insane!



We finally completed our load in at 3:30 in the afternoon, grabbed some food for the first time in 18 hours, and consequently just missed our driver - our last chance to return to the hotel for a shower and nap before the load out- so we were in it for the long haul. Since there wasn't really anywhere for us to go - except back to the tent with the muddy couch (everything was muddy at this point - no escaping the brown drudge!) I mostly sat on the side of the stage and watched the bands throughout the day while yawning with one eye open. At one point, I saw a couple standing on the side of the stage in front of me sharing a Guiness and a cigarette: Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins!!! Although I am a fan of them both (who doesn't love Thelma & Louise and The Shawshank Redemption?!), I was really admiring their "wellies" (galoshes) with great envy. I wondered if I had the energy and agility to knock them over, steal their boots (and maybe the rest of that Guiness) , and get away before security could get me.....Spending the next 12 hours without wet, muddy feet would sure have been worth it!
The Killers show went well - no problems with the wall and it was quite entertaining to see all the drunk, muddy, crazy kids going off. But by this time (24 hours into our work day) - the concert looked like this to me:

We were back to the "Dodgy Inn" after load out by about 3:30 a.m. - enough time to power wash the mud off, get a quick nap, and head to the airport at 9a.m. to get to Manchester to load in. Remember when I said, " Jokes on them?" HA. FREAKIN. HA. No amount of money will EVER tempt me to go through that misery again. Matt and I were saying, "I've never been so happy to get back to the Barbra Streisand tour!" Now that, my friends, is f#!@* up!!!

MANCHESTER
We landed around 11 a.m. and took a cab straight to the venue where our coworkers were already loading in. We were greeted by the Manchester United Police Force.
Oh, wait a damn minute. That's Jo and Jo in catering dressed up - complete with wigs, handcuffs and hamburger buns for shoulder pads?????? I'm telling you - these caterers are nuttier than squirrels with a fruitcake!


The next day was the show day. And I feel like I've let some of the Barbra fans (all two of you) down with no show pictures. So today - in an effort to stay awake during the mind-numbingly dull sound check - I brought my camera.
This is me with my video camera. It's called a 70X long glass. That's right, I can magnify whatever I shoot up to 70 times. We're talking blackheads and nose hairs people. Now let me explain something...When you use that magnification to its fullest extent, every little vibration within a 5 foot radius makes your picture shake. You can even see my heartbeat when I hold the handles. Now - knowing that, and knowing me and how fond I have become of the many beers of the world, and knowing that I have been known to have massively shakey hangovers, which I try to counteract by drinking loads of coffee - do you really think I'm the best choice for this particular camera?

Having said that, I came up with a great analogy of my job on this tour. Do you remember the movie "G.I. Jane" with Demi Moore - where she tries to become a Navy Seal? Remember how they keep all the candidates awake for 3 days in the cold and rain and then suddenly take them to a warm, dark room and play classical music and tell them they have to stay awake no matter what? That's kinda how I feel. Sleep deprived, sitting in the dark arena that is about 85 degrees due to lack of air conditioning and a massive amount of body heat, and I can't move one muscle or my camera shot looks like there is a 7.0 earthquake going on. Add that with Barbra's collection of lullabies and my lids are definitely hangin......zzzzzzzzz
ANYWAY - MOVING ON. Here is one of the video screens I work on.

Here's what Barbra looks like through my viewfinder.

Here's Barbra talking to the conductor in her fabulous calf-length haughty white diva coat.

Here's Barbra leaning on her chair struggling to read the teleprompter.

Here's Barbra sitting in her chair - I'm amazed she still has her shoes on at this point.

Here's Barbra desperately thinking of something to complain about.

Here is a full shot of the stage with Barbra and our beloved "orchestra." I've spent many hours calculating the trajectory and how many co-conspirators it would take to douse the entire stage with spitballs.

So! There you go Mom. Some pictures of old Babs for ya!

We returned to the hotel that night following the show and loading out, and low and behold, the hotel bar was still open for us! There is a God!!! I see the caterers sitting in the corner and join them and realize they are sitting with the Goo Goo Dolls. Not the crew for the Goo Goo Dolls, the Goo Goo Dolls themselves. Woah! They were staying in our hotel and apparently Jo spent a few years working for them and befriended the band (big surprise there - the girl could befriend a deaf, blind mute in a coma). So after a few drinks, the band left and we made plans to see their show the next night at the Manchester Apollo.



We had such a good time that night! We sat at the front of house sound mix booth and had a great view, some road cases to sit on, a steady flow of beer, and the band even talked Jo into coming on stage and doing a surprise guitar change for one of the guys for a laugh. Still reeling from the show, we stopped in for "just one more" beer at a bar down the street. But, as all good things must come to an end, so did our night....right after Patrick puked on the stairs of the bar and Steve...well, he wasn't really thrown out as much as he was asked to leave. Immediately. hahaha These youngins can't handle their drink!
Oh well, we have another travel day ahead and the mud bath part II coming up as we return to the motherland for the second time in 3 days. Surely it won't rain on us again, will it?!?!?
OH WAIT! ONE MORE THING......I FORGOT TO ADD MY RANDOM PICTURE FOR THIS UPDATE.

Now I love Toblerone, too, but this seems borderline absurd to me because, to be honest, I don't remember seeing a child anywhere near this lady or her stroller.
So long for now!

STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN




Our plane touched down in Stockholm, and we were greeted with great news. "Barbra is sick. (Come on - I'm not that mean! That's not the great news!) The Stockholm show is canceled." So we now have 5 days off to see what kind of trouble we can stir up...and you know how well we stir...
We had heard about an amazing ice bar down the street from our hotel - The Royal Viking (how primitive and barbaric does that sound?). So we were off to find it.

Everything...EVERYTHING in this place is made of ice. The walls, the seats, the bar, the shelves, even the glasses, and after working for three hours in there, the bartender, too, I think! Luckily they gave us those big heavy ponchos and gloves otherwise it would have been nearly unbearable. One of the girls was wearing flip-flops (not me for once) and I had to keep loaning her my shoes to thaw her toes.




It was really an amazing place. But, they only allow you to stay in for about 30 minutes - and thank god - the drinks were like 150 Swedish Kronnors each (I really don't know how much that is, but let's just say it was a large chunk of what I got out of the ATM). Also, I was freezing my ass off and you know how I hate the cold. After years of saying to people, "Geez, it's so cold I'm cuttin ice over here," it was finally true. heehee


After defrosting and getting the feeling back in my buttcheeks from sitting on ice for 30 minutes, we wondered into the old town and found a few pubs to bounce between before settling into one that had a band, who played for 5 more minutes and stopped. The bartender said the upstairs bar was closing - I said, what do you mean, what time is it? 11:30 p.m. and it was still daylight outside. Trippy. So we went downstairs to another cave-like bar and got our sweaty dance on!!!


The next morning we got up and decided it would be another boat day. There were so many choices - a long ride? Short ride? Castle? Viking Island? A VIKING island????????? Now you KNOW we have to see a viking island - so off we went.
The scenery and houses along the way were stunning! We passed hundreds of little islands varying in size - some were so small they only held one house!




We also heard a great folklore story about a king that was chased to the top of this island by viking pirates and in order to save his own life, he had to jump into the ocean and swim to another island for safety. The only thing that remained was his hat, which is supposedly on the top of this pole, and to this day it is called Hat Island. (Okay, so the story actually sounded a lot more interesting than that when I heard it - so do me a favor - just add your own embellishments until you say, "Wow, that was a reeeeally interesting story)


An hour and a half later, we arrived to the island of Burka.
And my arms were seriously exhausted from rowing!


It's quite a secluded island, and not really what I expected. You're totally on your own for 3-4 hours before the boat comes back for you (oh shit, did I just ruin the part where you really thought I paddled our asses all the way to the island?)
The boat captain made a stern warning not to miss the 6:30p.m. pick up or else we would be left there over night...which started conjuring up images of Lord Of The Flies and sparked a good conversation about who we would eat first if we had to turn to cannibalism to survive.


Wait! We could eat the sheep first!!! Whew! We found these guys all over the side of a big hill we were climbing to get to the big Celtic looking cross on top. I'm going to just skip right over the obvious sheep jokes, but we did think that one of the animals had taken a liking to Steve - so we told him to go for it! We wouldn't tell! heehee



We finally made it to the top (although we were huffin and puffin - none of us keeled over).
And the view from the top - breathtaking! (Not just because I'm out of shape, overweight, and haven't found a way to quit smoking yet - it really was breathtaking!)



Time for another random photo:
I don't really know what to say about it. Patrick is one eccentric fella. But he makes me laugh a lot, and that's all that matters.


After we made our way down the hill, said hello to the sheep again, we went looking for the viking village. Follow the smell of campfire and listen for the clinking of swords and you're on the right track.


This village is filled with people reenacting life during the viking period. Some were cooking over the firepit, some woodworking and carving with chisels, another was making viking replica jewelry with the same type of metals and leather.
It was quite fascinating. We sat and talked with the jewelry maker for some time, and he actually lives on the island. He was tied up in the rat race for many years and decided he was going to drop out and live a simplified life like they did many years ago. Incidentally, Jo and I would like to clarify something for those of you in our group that continue to ridicule and mock us : At first glance, when the man was sitting down behind a table, we kept saying how he was really handsome (in a viking sort of way). However, after carefully examining photographic evidence of said man in tight leather pants with a saggy ass and his belly hanging out while walking in sock-like booties, that he was, in fact, NOT our type. You can stop making fun of us now! (He's the guy turned away from the camera on the left in this photo).





After spending some time with the locals and buying some jewelry, we decided it was time for some grub and a beer from the small restaurant near the dock.


Not really sure if it was bravery, stupidity, or blindness, but these little shitheads kept pecking at my toes like they were french fries or something.


This was such an awesome day. Because we were dropped off on the island and couldn't leave, we were actually forced to slow down and enjoy a day outside in the sunshine! I love that!





After dinner at a restaurant with quite a diverse menu...


...we headed off to the beer gardens on top of the city. It's a good thing we enjoyed our sunshine when we did, because it started to rain again!


The last night in Stockholm, I went back to the beer gardens and met up with some of the crew members from The Who. It turns out one of their caterers and I worked together on Korn 5 years ago. This is Sean!


We ended up at a unique place called "Garlic & Shots." A bar that serves only dishes with heavy heavy garlic and a bar with 101 different shots.

I took this picture for my pirate buddies back in AZ. ARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHH! Maybe we'll have a garlic pirate night when I get back and I'll cook up some smelly garlicy stuff!!!


Next up we headed to some metal rock bar where I talked to a guy who was in the Kosovo war, accidentally got left behind by my group, and got cussed at and spit on by a really drunk Scottish dude. That's got to be a sign that its time to get the hell out of Sweden!! I had a great time in Stockholm and I got to see more of this city than I ever have before....but...I'm movin on!!!!!!!
Next up, drowning in mud, endless work days, and drowning in mud part II.
See ya soon!