On to Vienna, Austria!!!
Actually, that might sound a little too casual. Those four words imply that we simply jogged on over......not so. We began with a 9a.m. lobby call to take a bus to the airport. When we arrive to check in, we are met by the orchestra, who also has to check in. I will be acquainting you with this very eclectic group of people throughout the blog, but for now, let me paint a picture for you: 75 band geeks, most of whom have rarely traveled, and certainly have never participated in the roadie guerilla warfare style of travel (Get your shit! Everyone on a bus! Everyone off! Get your shit! Check in! Slam 3 beers in the airport bar!! Rush through security - shoes off laptops out! Get on plane! Pass out!).
So now we have a huge party of mostly socially inept musicians who think they are far superior to any of the crew guys because they blow into a horn or drag a stick across some strings, meandering through the airport, mouths agape, dragging enormous instruments (which they also believe are superior to us - "umm, I have a cello. I need a seat for my cello").
Coming from a former flight attendant - the boarding process is nothing short of a goat-roping. But finally - everyone (and everything) gets into a seat and straps in (it is now noon). An hour and a half flight, and this foundering process continues through baggage claim, customs, immigration, on to buses and finally to the hotel (two separate hotels, might I add, or my next blog would be about someone surgically removing a viola from their ass!) It is now approximately 5:00p.m.. So this is what I have to look forward to every travel day! About an 8 hour process that normally would take 3. Patience, Kim, patience!


ANYWAY - I was in Vienna with the Chili Peppers about 8 months ago but I forgot to write about it because it was one of our last stops and frankly, I was lazy and had a bad case of "lack of interest." So, I thought I would show you some pics from that visit, too because it was right before Christmas and the city was decorated beautifully!!







































The Stephansdom is a massive cathedral that was started in 1147 and completed in 1511!!!!!! That is just so hard for me to believe! Our country was barely discovered, meanwhile they are busy erecting the most complex archtiecture still to date! Now I know why people come to Europe just to see all of the cathedrals - it is beyond breathtaking!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St._Stephen's_Cathedral,_Vienna









Incidentally, I saw this fifty-something year old lady on the street corner, and she just had such an air about her, with the grandiose way she strolled up to the corner in her little ensemble, you could tell that she knew people were looking at her with great envy...and by george, we were! You know, I just thought it would be such a shame that only people on this continent were blessed enough to witness this little number, so I've made it my mission to get this outfit seen all over the world!




This first night in Vienna, in an effort to really dive into the Austrian flavor and culture, we ate dinner at a Japanese sushi restaurant in an outdoor market area.
















Now if this does not put your innards to the ultimate test, I can only think of one other thing that might - a wasabi pea eating contest. After our dinner, we gathered in Charlie's hotel room (really he just wanted to show off how much better of a room he got than us!) to have some cheese and wine, and of course, the wasabi peas (which, if you don't know, are dried peas coated in dried wasabi - a crunchy but very spicy little snack food). I'm not really sure whose idea it was or how it all started, but since I have been assigned the party picture detail, I did not have to participate - only shoot and laugh and hope one of them didn't choke! Ian was the winner with 54 in his mouth at one time and the girls tied at 32! I believe this would be what Charlie refers to as a "rim stinger" on the toiletten the next day.


















Well we had to give up all of the laughter and sight-seeing to load in this mammoth show. Remember how I was telling you that I would have so much time off over here? Well each show takes 2 and in some cases 3 days to load in and once you factor in the travel day fiascos, we have only had 3 days total off since I left home (and I'm writing this on July 3rd).
The venue we played in Vienna is called the Schonbrunner Palace.
















This place is unreal. There are thousands of acres of very carefully manicured lawns, flowers, and trees, a zoo, waterfountains and statues galore, cafes, museums, and more!















Apparently many many years ago, a king lived here and then died - and because there were no heirs to the throne - that was the end of monarchy. At some point (I think around WWII) the city decided to let homeless people move in for very low rent that would be controlled. And there are still some living there today - for like $50/month. We heard that they are remodelling these quarters and will begin to rent them to the general public for New York City-like prices or higher! How would you like to come home to a palace everyday??- wicked!

http://www.schoenbrunn.at/de/publicdir/

On the first load in day, Vienna recorded its highest temperature in many many years. Over 90 degrees with lots of humidity! Add the heat with trying to push road cases over rickety cobblestone, a psychotic promoter that continually made us move gear and trucks around for "fire code" and a long hike to get water or to use a restroom, and we were off to a good start on this gig. Half way through the day, I was beginning to closely resemble my arch nemesis - the pungent stinky euro-stagehand. It was hot man!
At some point, on this particular day, I realized that I forgot to pack belts for this trip. As I continued to stretch and sweat and climb around, my pants kept falling down, so I asked some co-workers for tie line.....thick black string that I make-shift into a belt. Because this string kept coming untied, I tied it into a triple knot. But not to worry - It was so damn hot, and I sweat so much, that I drank two cups of coffee, two diet cokes, and about 15 bottles of water........OVER 10 HOURS........and I still didn't have to go pee. Good thing, because the knot I had tied for my make-shift belt was impossible to get undone. In the meantime, I went to catering where I found some fabulous salads for dinner. I promptly stuck my fork in a big juicy tomato from one of these salads and not only bit the tomato, but bit the fork as well. AND CHIPPED MY FREAKIN FRONT TOOTH. So now we have a sweaty, dirty, wayward roadie, with a chipped tooth and a string belt to hold her pants up....wow, I am totally rockin the white trash hillbilly girl right now.






On day two, the heat had let up just a bit, and the breeze kicked in to make it a tolerable day. So after we were show ready, we took a walk around the grounds of the palace to see what we could see...















































We also took a quick peek into Barbra's dressing room. Holy canoli! I'll bet her royal highness (heinous, hindass, whatever) wasn't bitchin about this place!



As we are strolling back to the stage, we get a call over the radio - weather update, prepare for some rain, guys! Oh joy. No worries though, we have rolls and rolls of plastic that we already had pre-cut for the gear to use just in case. The cameras had their rain coats on and we even strapped the ones outside of the front of house tent down to their platforms in case of wind. I was a girlscout, man, I am prepared for this shit!
30 minutes later, no rain.
45 minutes later, no rain.
Then we hear Babs is on her way to the stage, so we man our cameras. 1 hour later, no rain. But then I glance over to my right and what do I see?













Looks like we're gonna get wet!!! Exactly nine minutes after I took this picture, the temperature dropped about 25 degrees and about 2500 plastic chairs came flying at me as I stood on my camera platform trying desperately to re-strap my camera that I had undone to shoot the rehearsal.









The instruments attached to the stage which measure wind gusts (so we know just how much it will take to bring that big-ass stage crashing down) measured 105 mile per hour winds. I am ducking sand, rocks, dust, more chairs and miscellaneous items that are whipping through the open-aired house. It is pelting rain sideways, down, up and I am starting to panic. I have nowhere to go and I can't even really see because of all the crap in my eyes. I look up and the spot towers are swaying back and forth over my head along with a 2000 lb. video wall. I don't know where I'm going but I'm on my way outta there!!!!!! We ran to this outdoor walkway and hid behind large pillars for at least some protection and watched for two hours while the stage and all the equipment took a huge beating. First the shrouding around the video wall came undone.














Then the two safety ropes on the bottom corners came undone.




Then the extra safety ratchet strap came undone.




Then Jerry came undone.




We were all soaking wet, exhausted, worried about the gear, hungry (the catering tent came off the ground and knocked over most of the kitchen equipment and food) and as I ran into a this lady who looked at me and said, "Barbra will still sing, yes? I come all the way from Italy. She will still sing?" I almost kicked her teeth in.
But a few hours later......as if nothing had happened, the sky performed the most beautiful sunset, almost as an apology I think.




The decision was to postpone the show until the next night. That would give us 24 hours to dry off, lick our wounds, fix what gear we could and band-aid together a show for that Italian bitch. The next day was beautiful- not a cloud in the sky and cool. We scrambled and fixed everything we could with the video walls. We would have to wait for replacement tiles to change those that were water soaked. Our camera inside the tent (the one this girlscout DIDN'T strap down) took a dive right into the sound console. Our camera sustained one dent and a broken view finder but the sound console took lots of work!! We were finally show ready and even squeazed a sound check rehearsal in!!!!!!!

Then, wouldn't you know it, about two hours before the show - a 30 minute downpour of rain! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??!!?? DAMN YOU MOTHER NATURE!!!!!!!!


That night we packed up a few things and due to noise ordinance had to come back the next day to load out. As soon as we were done working the next morning (my birthday) our thoughts were, "BRING ON THE BEER." Our flight was 6 hours later that day so we had some time to kill! We sat in the beer garden at the palace and tied one on! Look how sweet my guys are - Scotty shaped his food into a birthday present for me. Men never really grow up, do they? hehehe I love it!




Another hectic flight to Paris and we finally got to the hotel around 11 p.m. I was exhausted, but I wasn't about to let 33 sneak by uncelebrated - or to let 33 think that I'm going to let it make me think I'm too old for this shit - so off to a club...until 5:30 in the morning. How do I do it, you ask? I haven't a freakin clue. I blame society. And the caterers.





Cheers! Here's to finally getting out of the shitty weather anomaly they call Vienna!
Next up.........Paris!!!!!!!!!! Where I can make an absolute fool of myself pretending that I have some grasp on their language while really, I'm a complete hack! I do make the cab drivers laugh, though!
See ya soon.